Your clock hits 10 PM on a Friday and after a long week, you snuggle deep into the duvet. The silence gets interrupted by passing Instagram stories. Images and videos flash before your eyes until one catches your attention: your friends at a bar, seemingly having fun. You see lots of smiles, but there’s one thing missing—you. You declined the invitation to that outing a few days prior, and right when the anxiety is supposed to hit, you feel nothing. You can’t even hear that little voice saying “I should’ve gone.” If anything, you look back at the picture and realize you’re happy right there where you are.
If you have ever felt this before, you have likely experienced JOMO (Joy of Missing Out). Most of us are probably familiar with its cousin FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), the dreaded fear of being left out or not part of something. FOMO loves to sneak up when you least expect it, usually when you’re scrolling through endless photos of your friends doing literally anything. But what if I told you that missing out can actually be the best part? That’s where JOMO comes in.
I first learned about JOMO in my “Designing Safe Online Spaces for Children” course for the IE Challenge. We were learning some vocabulary regarding online safety, and that’s when the term came up. I’d never heard of it before, but as I thought about it, I realized I’d already experienced JOMO plenty of times without even knowing it had a name! Those nights I stayed in, feeling totally at peace while everyone else was out—those were JOMO moments.
The Benefits of JOMO
So, why is JOMO such a game-changer, especially for university students? For one, it gives you the power to say no without feeling guilty. When you embrace JOMO, you’re allowing yourself to prioritize what you actually want, rather than what you think you should want.JOMO also gives you space to recharge. Between classes, extracurriculars, and keeping up with a social life, it’s easy to feel burnt out. But when you embrace the joy of missing out, you’re taking time for yourself. You’re recharging your mental and emotional batteries so that, when you do decide to join in on the fun, you’re genuinely present and not running on fumes.
Lastly, let’s not forget about mental health. Constantly chasing after experiences and comparing yourself to others online isn’t just tiring—it’s stressful. By practicing JOMO, you’re cutting out that self-imposed pressure. You’re more in tune with what makes you happy and less concerned with keeping up with whatever reality you’re being presented in social media.
How to Avoid FOMO and Embrace JOMO
Avoiding FOMO is easier said than done, especially when we’re constantly looking at our phones. So, here are a few tips to help you swap that fear for joy:
- Limit Social Media Time: We all know Instagram and TikTok are prime breeding grounds for FOMO. One way to sidestep it? Take regular breaks. Set screen time limits or dedicate certain hours of the day when you go phone-free. Trust me, you won’t miss much.
- Plan with Intention: It’s easy to say “yes” to every invitation, but being selective with what you commit to is key. Ask yourself: Do I really want to do this? Am I just going because other people are going? Is my body too tired? What does my gut say?
- Enjoy Solitude: JOMO is all about enjoying your own company. So, lean into activities that bring you joy when you’re alone—reading, cooking, watching that show you’ve been putting off. Make time for hobbies that make you feel good without the need for external validation.
- Practice Gratitude: One of the simplest ways to counter FOMO is to appreciate what you already have. When you focus on the good things in your life, you’re less likely to feel like you’re missing out on what others are doing.
Experiencing JOMO in Everyday Life
JOMO doesn’t have to be some grand gesture where you cancel all plans and become a recluse. After all, you still need a social life. It’s more about creating small moments of peace and joy amidst the busyness of life. Maybe it’s saying no to a party because you’ve had a long week, or skipping a group study session to have some quiet time. JOMO is about finding those pockets of time where you can slow down, be still, and enjoy not being everywhere all at once.
Conclusion
So, the next time you’re faced with a decision to either go out or stay in, remember this: it’s perfectly fine to choose you. JOMO isn’t about isolation; it’s about balance. It’s about recognizing that you don’t have to be everywhere or do everything to be fulfilled. Sometimes, the most joyful moments are the ones where you’re right where you want to be—on your own terms, with zero FOMO in sight.
You’re experiencing the joy of choosing exactly what you need.
