Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble are among the innovations that have completely transformed traditional love, romance, and dating. Although there are many success stories of couples that have met through said apps, and they do create a unique and modern opportunity to connect with people from all over the world, it also opens the door for catfishing, scams, and data privacy concerns.
Catfishing
Everyone has had the “not me” mindset—“I would never fall for a catfish,” OR “Whoever does is just dumb.” But the reality is far more complex than an obvious stock image and lousy texting. These people have motives, such as financial scams, and they put in a lot of effort. They spend months and even years talking and earning the trust of the innocent person on the other end of the call. In 2022, 27% of online daters admitted to being catfished. Moreover, it is estimated that 10% of all online dating profiles are fake.
Recently turned into the Netflix original documentary “Sweet Bobby,” Kirsten Assi fell victim to an elaborate scheme for eight years. Bobby was not only a supposed cardiologist—he actually was one. Bobby was a real person, only his identity was stolen. The first five years, it was a solid friendship, with Assi even having a partner herself. However, soon they became more, and Bobby became controlling of Assi’s life. He psychologically and emotionally manipulated Assi making her feel responsible for his anxiety attacks and even heart attacks. This guilt weighed heavily on Assi, and she was constantly emotionally distraught.
One day, Assi decided to confront him, which meant finally meeting Bobby in person, and she showed up to his house in Brighton.
“There was always an excuse why he couldn’t come to London,” Assi told The British Site. “When we tried to video call, his phone camera was always broken.”
As the real Bobby opened the door and had no idea who was standing in front of him, cursing him out, Assi had too many emotions crossing her head. Humiliation was the strongest.
But the real shock came once she found out that her catfisher was actually her 17-year-old cousin, Simran Bhogal. “I just couldn’t understand it, I kept screaming, ‘ten years of my life, you’ve stolen ten years of my life!’”
Beyond catfishing, deception on dating apps is widespread. 42% of Tinder users have a partner; 30% being married and 12% are dating.
Scamming
Innocent people have to pay for the damage—literally. Scamming is usually the catfisher’s end goal. After successfully earning the trust of their victim, they manipulate them into sending money.
Perhaps a bit of an usual way to scam and ask for money, Ryan—who wished to remain by just his first name, told Vice that the girl he was speaking to on Tinder showed up, but looked nothing like her photos. “She didn’t look bad in real life, but her photos did not represent what she looked like,” Throughout the date, she o ordered the most expensive plates on the menu and did not engage in conversation.
“That’s when I realized what was happening”, admitted Ryan. With no text back after the date, she was never heard from again, and it was clear she just wanted a free meal all along.
Data Privacy
To find your one true love, you put yourself out there on these apps—sharing your likes, interests, education background to seem smarter, and more. You’re also regularly updating profile pictures and your location. Anything to maximize the probability of securing the one. While your intentions are innocent, the intention of these apps may not be. If this information falls into the wrong hands, could be in trouble.
That’s exactly what happened to Monsignor Jeffrey Burrill, executive officer of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.His phone was tracked and found using the gay dating app Grindr. How? A Catholic newsletter, “The Pillar,” got ahold of the location data from the app to monitor its members and see who was using it. Burill resigned shortly after.
It is important to acknowledge not only how dangerous it is to form a connection with a person online, but also the dangers of sharing personal information with these apps themselves. However, by following safety precautions like being mindful of what you put online, how to meet up with someone for the first time, (sharing their name and where you’re meeting them with a trusted friend)—you could become another success story.
Featured Image Courtesy of Forbes
